Sure has.....July, Wow....Last time I wrote anything on this blog. I've had a lot that could actually been put down on paper but just have not felt complelled to write. So, I think I will do a nut-shell thing. This will be a great challenge, (seeing I'm somewhat long-winded and all) and puting anything in a "Nut-shell" just kinda goes against my nature. But, I will try.
The last month has brought about so many changes and realizations. I'm at home, not working.........yeah, I am, still catering, but not actually physically leaving my house to go to a place of business. That's stange. I'm here with my boyz and I really think we have now seriously exhausted eachother of ourselves. School starts next week and I am going to tap dance in the street! Get them outta here! But, that is not to say that I've not had some, many moments, of enjoyment and happiness. I am so thankful to have them and the time we've spent together. Geting closer even if so many hurdles have been placed. Just jump over them and go to the next.
The beginning of the month started with a fairly lucrative catering job, which............and this is a big which........I hired my ex-husband's, jazz band to play. Yeah........Well, the "host" of this party asked me if I knew of a good jazz band.....and, unforunately, I do........yes, we did this "gig" together, which (little which) worked out fine. It was before this gig that didn't work out so fine.
As I was preparing their food, boy number 2 confessed to me his true feelings about his father. They weren't good. In fact, I cried. I got to hear his pent up anger/frustration and hate (his words) towards his father. It broke my heart and I always knew, that eventually this would happen. I can only hold my ex responsible for this matter. He is the one who did an about face in their lives and basically traded them in for Sugar Mamma. I've been telling him for over the last year that this would eventually happen, but who am I? Remember, according to him?: I'm just completely nuts.....or.....unstable......the polite form. Either way? It still broke my heart! I hate what my divorce...our divorce.....has done to my kids.
Speaking of Sugar Mamma.........I gotta to meet her! What a piece of work. She's very attractive...very. But? She seriously has no personality and completely lacks any and all social graces. I went to a party that some mutual friends of both my ex's and mine were having. There she comes all up-scale, fake boob, porn-star lookng. Is there such a thing as an upscale, porn-star? Seriously. It's basically her age that leads to her attractiveness. When I'm 50, I hope I still look that good......in a sort of fake kinda way.......not!
She sat on my girlfriend's porch swing and would not talk to anyone. No one. Exept, she found it quite entertaining or amusing to evesdrop on whatever I was talking about at the next table. Everytime she thought that my back was turned, she would turn towards the table I was sitting at and strain to hear what I was talking about. Sweetie would turn towards her direction and just glare at her. He busted her all night. I just love him. He does have my back!
The next week? I was with boy#1 and I ran into another friend who never knew the connection. She finally figured out that my ex was my son's dad and went on and on and on about what she thought was my son's step mom. She told my son she felt so sorry for him because "that woman is so awful". They call her "Scarecrow". Scarecrow.......Sugar Mamma.......same thing.
Best compliment of my life will always be when my ex told me that Scarecrow/Sugar Mamma and I are "Polar Opposites".. Thank you, and yes there is a God. And thank he/she for giving me a personality AND a sense of humor!
A couple of days later? Boy#2 and his father went to blows in MY house! Boy#2's anger, frustration, etc.........came to fruition and I had to call the police. That was a joy. I reuse to ever allow myself to be harmed breaking up a physical fight between two grown men, that, I might add.....are a hell of lot bigger than I am!!!!!!! Police did not show until I left, to go get my severly damaged glasses fixed........Two fucking hours later! They told me I need to file a restraining order against my ex. HMMMMMMMMMMMMM.......let's see..........my words? And I quote: You know? My only agenda here is to PROMOTE a relationship WITH their father as opposed to push him further away. What does a restaining order do????? PUSH him even further away! Mandatory counseling would be a better option to a restraining order! (That would be tooooooo logical).
Ex? Sprained (poor baby) finger.........Boy#2? Bruised arm............... Real good............"MEN"!
Boy#2 turned 17 last week. Ok...........now act like a man since you so desparately want to be treated in that manner.
Sweetie? Well...........he's working about 12-16 hour days. I barely get to see him. Accorrding to him, he's doing all of this for me. That's another part that breaks my heart. He's moving in with us the beginning of the year and wants a bunch of money, in the bank, to re-do my loan. Ok........yeah, I can appreciate that and am very greatful. However, I just want your extra time and your...........kiss. I don't want someone who falls asleep at 8:30 at night.
Another challenge/hurdle of the month? I found out that I've had no homeowners insurance on my home for the last three months. Ex-man decided to "let it lapse." It's not his house, so why bother, why care? Another legal issue that is being addressed. But, I've over-come that one by only blaming me. I always took care of those "little" things.......then, I threw in the towel, stupidly, and handed the reigns to him. That's been rectified and a new policy has been issued and placed into effect under an emergency situatiion. The positive? Again, these are the signs in life that tell me, for real, that there is truly a God and that I have one hell of a Guardian Angel who is sincerely working overtime!
I'm going back to school in September...........and?????? I'm working on my third, yes, third interview with a local paper. It's a very, very......liberal, weekly rag.......that I'm very excited about. It will be mostly advertising, with??????? some writing. And the pay is good, the benefits are good, it's all good.
But? I've got to get a manicure and soon. If there are any typos.....it's not me. Well, it is.......but not me really. I've got to get these long-ass nails cut! Tomorrow......providing there are not any major hurdles to jump! So much fo he nut-shell.....not going to happen. Oh, that just reminded me about watching a squirell die Sunday. That was just painful. Nah.....alls I'm going to say is that was just cruel.......he fell out of a tree in front of my parents' house and I hate to watch anything suffer. We'll just leave that one be. I need to continually remind myself that I can not controll everything and that shit will happen. Just learn from it and move on.
Ciao,
Angie
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8 comments:
Yeah it's been a long time--Hon, you've got a sweet lover to cut through the bitter of your life.
It seems too bad that you actually have to communicate with your ex. I mean, if your life is better without him, maybe your kids lives would be too.
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